God I hate marketing speak, “Park this idea”, “Blue Sky”, “Rich Scalable Platform”, ” Synergise Solutions”.

Have I missed any good ones ? Add them to this blog if you’ve heard some good ones recently.I need a good laugh !

Why can’t marketing people talk in plain English ? Instead they just come across as pretentious idiots when they try and do this.

And it’s important for your website too :

” Website visitors evaluate the relevance of a website to their needs in under five seconds. If they can’t figure out what you do, they’re on to the next website. Confuse them and you lose them.”

Instead of trying to dazzle your customers with your wealth of marketing buzzwords and neologisms just give them the facts in a simple easy to understand context.

Its not limited to Marketing folk either, try working with the Public Sector, these guys have their own agenda in generating confusing language (I’ve met someone in this field who I have no idea what they are talking about 80% of the time), look at this for example :

“High-quality learning environments are a necessary precondition for facilitation and enhancement of the ongoing learning process.”

Huh ?

Why not say : “Children need good schools if they are to learn properly.”

Support The Campaign for Plain English if you’re as tired of all this stuff as I am.

This is a good link too - David Merman Scott has a great marketing blog and even has a free PDF download on all these marketing speak shananigans on his site thats worth a look as it applies as much in the US as it does here in the UK.